Things I Learnt Whilst Renovating : My Top Ten Tips*

(*Alternative titles that were rejected: 'Renovating? Don't Make All The Stupid Mistakes I Did' or 'Renovating? How Not To Have Several Nervous Breakdowns. Like I Did'.) 

Guys! The house is starting to look really goddamn good! We've had the landscapers here this week so the garden is mostly done, we have lights where we are meant to have lights, and decking and bookshelves and a heater. There's still a longish list of defects and incomplete stuff that's being slowly ticked off but generally the whole thing is looking more house and less building site. This is really, really exciting. (I have a rule of not swearing online but I'm finding it pretty hard not to swear in this post because it's freaking amazing that we've finally gotten to this point. I want to swear, a lot, in happiness.). 

It's been quite a journey. I have learnt a lot. If we ever do this again (DEAR LORD NO) I will do so many things differently. If you're like me and are embarking on this kind of thing you'll probably just wade in blindly with optimism in your heart despite of all those Grand Design episodes you've watched. So, I'm actually not writing this for you. I'm writing this for future me. Future me - pay attention, okay?

1. Invest in a really, really good vacuum cleaner. Or just hire a full time duster. Or both. 

2. Be nice. To the various builders and the tradies, to the architect if you're using one. These people are building your house. Yes, you're paying them lots of money to do the job, but a smile and a thank you will go a long way too. If you're the have-a-cuppa-and-a-freshly-baked-biccie kind of person share that with whoever is on site. I'm not very good with that kind of hospitality - I blame my parents (that's a joke Mum, okay?) - so that's not me. I try to be nice in other ways. Basically if someone does something awesome, tell them. 

We've met some really talented, passionate tradespeople throughout this project who've variously worked magic with wood and plaster and bricks, and steel and sandstone and joinery (and I can't forget the upholstery whisperer; he takes cushions to a whole other level). They have unique skills and they are proud of their work. It's really great to let them know when you think they've done something really great. 

It also pays to be nice to your neighbours (even when they complain), and to the council rangers (who are just doing their job). Keep the neighbours in the loop. When things were dragging on a bit I dropped a thank you note with my contact details and a bribe block of chocolate in a few letterboxes. I also put a thank you hamper together for our immediate neighbours. Without patient and understanding neighbours your big build won't happen. 

3. But not too nice. You may not want to be the annoying person who says 'You know how you spent six hours yesterday building that thing? Well it's in the wrong spot / looks like crap / shouldn't be fluro pink and you need to redo it'. But sometimes you need to be that person; you're the one who is going to have to live with that thing.

I'm not very good at being the annoying person; I tend to avoid conflict. But it just ends in tears if you put the short term needs of a tradie ahead of the long term needs of you and your family. Trust me. (Side note: our architect was awesome here. He is passionate about getting everything as 'right' as possible. Which sometimes made us all roll our eyes (like when he got the builder to redo a particular bulkhead for the third time just days before we were meant to move in) but with every decision, push, annoyance I can honestly say the short term pain was worth the long term awesomeness.) 

To be honest the whole renovation process has forced me to really look at my idea of being nice and what that actually means. It's okay if you live in a bubble, but sometimes you do need to be the bad guy to get things done or get your point heard. Which sucks, because I like to believe that people are generally lovely and nice and do the things they say they are going to do. But sometimes they don't, and you'll need to hold them accountable for that. 

4. Don't be afraid to look like an idiot. If you're a newbie like me you will go into this having no idea at all of what to expect, and you'll spend most of the time having no idea at all as to what's actually going on. Two things I wish I'd done differently: 1) Paid more attention in the early months (I didn't because we were still living in Korea and I kind of thought it was all okay), and 2) Asked more questions from the beginning. I didn't want to ask too many questions because I'd look like a fool (so I didn't ask questions and felt like a fool instead). These days I ask a ton of questions, and I'm thoroughly enjoying being more involved in the process. (Related - this post by Lana of The Sharpest Pencil was all too familiar...)

5. Don't underestimate the importance of relationships. The biggest lesson for me? It's not bricks and wood and paint that get your house built - it's communication. The interaction between the architect, the builder, the foreman and you is vitally important. Don't neglect those relationships because when you do delays and mistakes happen. 

Make sure everyone gets along on day one (when things are easy), and do what you can to make sure everyone still gets along on day one hundred and one (when things may not be so easy). I'm not talking a campfire love-in with hugs and singing and toasted marshmallows. I'm talking a good, working relationship. There will be creative tension, there will be differences of opinion and there will be the occasional rolling of eyes - and that's all fine and part of the process. But if open and clear communication becomes a casualty, you're in for some rocky times.

6. If you're paying for an expert, take their advice. Be prepared to compromise. Our approach throughout the whole project has been that we are paying good money for the advice of an architect, so we better bloody listen to it. And it's been a good approach. The injection of light into the house, the clever resolution of some tricky spaces, the flow from inside to outside - all of this has come from the advice of our architect (and the hard work of our builder and many, many tradies). 

Obviously the first step is making sure you've got the right expert for you and your project. But, once you do, pay attention to what they're telling you. If you've chosen well it's likely they know what they're talking about. 

7. But don't compromise on everything. If you feel really, really strongly about something, fight for it. For me there were three things that I really wanted in the house - a black front door, a Coco Flip light, a marble waterfall bench top. Those three things are in the house, and I adore them. 

Our architect made it clear from the outset that there were some things he felt strongly about and would petition us to invest in, but equally he was happy for us to put the case forward for things we felt strongly about. I thoroughly enjoyed both sides of that equation.

8. It will never be perfect. Well, maybe if you had unlimited funds and you were dealing with a completely new build it might be perfect. But generally you will be working to a budget and a timeframe, and you'll be dealing with the legacy of many, many previous builders and do-it-yourselfers (we've discovered there's not a single straight line in our terrace house...). Your renovation might turn out to be awesome and amazing, it might be 'very you', but don't put the pressure on it (or yourself) to be perfect.

9. It will never be finished. A few days after we moved in to our (still quite unfinished) house we did a walk-though with the architect outlining the things we wanted to change (remove a pendant light here, get rid of a door there, build in some shelves here...). Three months later and I'm currently in the midst of completely reorganising our upstairs spare room / office space, and I'm already planning to get the painters back in a few months to give the house 'one last' go over. There will always be something more to do.

10. Don't buy all your furniture at once. See how you use the space, what the space actually needs, before you rush out and get everything. Spreading it out over a long period of time also gives you the chance to both: a) snap up a bargain when you come across one (our bedside tables were the one's on display in The Design File's Open House which meant we got a decent discount), and b) invest in some super special pieces (our couch is freaking awesome...and took more than three months to arrive once ordered).

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So, that's a few things I've learnt - how about you? Have you undertaken a big renovation project? What did you find out along the way?

ProBlogger : Five Things I Learnt

In my last post I mentioned that I'd just returned from the Problogger Training Event. It was two days of fabulous sessions on all kinds of things - from the nitty gritty of Google Analytics to ways to engage your community and tips on becoming a freelance writer. I also met some really ace people in the flesh for the first time (*waves hello to Cheryl, Jess and Elle*) and got to spend more time with some other bloggy friends (Hello Dannielle!). So much food for thought! Now that the dust has settled a little, here are some of the key things I picked up... 

1. ProBlogger isn't all about making money from your blog. 

Sometimes it is, but sometimes it's not. During the opening session, Trey Ratcliff told a story about Star Trek's Leonard Nimoy - about how his real passion is Shakespeare, but he made his money by acting in a sci fi TV show. The money making bit is related to the passion bit, but it's not where he generated his income. Later, I attended a very informative session on freelance writing with Valerie Khoo and Kelly Exeter. One of the things they talked about was writing copy for corporate newsletters and company websites. They talked about writing that feeds your soul and writing that pays the bills.

This sort of stuff is music to the ears of bloggers like me who feel a little uneasy about sponsored posts (and, let's be honest, who don't quite have the blogging dedication required to build an appropriate audience to garner sponsorships). Yes, ProBlogger is about making a profession out of a hobby, but there are so many forms that this can take. 

Across a range of speakers it became clear that blog monetisation isn't just about sponsored posts and advertising. It's about partnerships and collaborations. It's about ebooks and opportunities; finding those areas on the outskirts of your passion, the things you love that overlap with the things people need.

2. You don't have to be the expert. 

This was a theme that came up again and again. One of the things Darren Rowse talked about in his opening keynote was that you need to deal with the fact that you'll never know it all. Put aside time to learn, figure out how to build your knowledge, but realise that there will always be more to know. 

This was something I definitely needed to hear. I always put off doing things because 'I don't know how'. I don't call myself a blogger or a writer or a photographer because I feel like an impostor when I do, because there's so much I don't know yet. But maybe it's time to acknowledge the skills that I have, to be be proactive about the things I want to learn, and to just start doing stuff. 

Somewhat related was another common theme - these days bloggers and brands alike are focussed on 'engagement', on 'making the reader the hero'. This means that you don't need to be the expert, you and the reader can learn together. Want to blog about veganism but you're not a nutritionist? That's okay - admit the gaps in your knowledge and take your community on a journey with you. 

3. I don't want to change the world. 

In that room of 450 or so bloggers dreaming big, I'm pretty sure I was in the minority on this one. But it's true, I don't. What I do want is to be good at what I do. I want to be proud of the things I write and the photos I take. I want to learn a lot more about the technical stuff, and build on the skills I have. And I want to be a nice person. 

Sounds kind of lame, right? But it's true. I want to be a great wife, a great step-mum; to enjoy time with my mum and sister and nephews and family. I want to create good things; to contribute to my little community, my little corner of the earth. But I don't want to change the world. 

4. I still suck at small talk. But that's okay. 

Thanks to my previous experience as a trainer and facilitator in the corporate world, and that whole moving overseas thing, I am much better at chit chat than I ever used to be. But there are still times when I am incredibly awkward or just say really dumb stuff. I'm pretty sure this lady now thinks I am a total freak / airhead, which kind of sucks because she's a blogger I admire. But that's okay, we all mess up sometimes. And next time it will be better. 

5. No matter who you meet (or don't meet) at the event, your network will grow.

At the last minute I drew up a list of people I wanted to connect with. I tracked most of them down (although I missed Lisa Tilse which I'm quite sad about because her blog is a thing of beauty). But here's the thing - in the week or so since ProBlogger I've got a ton of new active Twitter followers and a handful of new Facebook friends. They are people that I noticed using the #pbevent tag (and they noticed me), or who I saw interacting with some of my favourite tweeters (and vice versa). So don't fret too much if you don't make all the connections you wanted to at the event (it's a pretty hectic few days) - you'll find your network will continue to grow afterwards anyway. 

So, that's what I learnt at ProBlogger. Well, to be honest it's just the tip of the iceberg. I'll be back in the next week or so with another post about some of my favourite speakers and a bit more about what they actually said. So, stay tuned! 

Oh! And a bonus thing I learnt - 6. I do not like the Gold Coast. It is all the bad things about Australia crammed along an (admittedly gorgeous) coastline. I really, really do not like it. But more on that at a later date...

Six Things I Learnt On The Trip That Was*

1. Germans do have a sense of humour. 

Germans generally get a bad rap in the humour department; I think it is undeserved. I offer this little tale as proof.

When you cruise in Europe, one of the things you notice is that any announcement onboard goes for a very long time. That's because they do it in five or so languages. And whilst it's pretty impressive to hear the same person switch from Italian to English to French to German to Spanish without skipping a beat, the time it takes does wear a bit thin. 

So - we were sitting in the theatre one day, gathered with our life jackets and a few hundred other people for our emergency evacuation drill (we'd been a bit naughty and missed the drill on day one...). It was just after midday so we'd all been dragged away from reading a good book by the pool, or settling into a three course lunch at the buffet, or just generally lazing about contemplating our next gelato. And we were all keen to get back to our book / lunch / gelato. The emergency drill kicked of in Italian, then moved on to English. Then they asked if any one spoke Español, a few people put their hands up. There was general eye rolling around the room - a third language meant more time inside, away from the sunshine. Then they asked if any one spoke Deutsch and a firm, loud 'NEIN!' rang out across the room...

2. Grande does not always mean what you think it means. 

We travel pretty light, but knowing that there were potentially three adults, one adult-sized kid and one kid on the road trip part of this holiday I specifically  booked a 'grande' car. When we went to pick it up, the lady at the car hire counter confirmed it was indeed a grande car. Awesome, right?

Except that, as it turned out, us and our carry-on luggage barely squeezed into this grande car (and that was with one less adult than originally planned). Fitting the bags in the boot was like an advanced game of tetris; backpacks were piled on the backseat, legs were around armpits. This 'grande' car (for which I paid a grande-ish premium) was smaller than the 'standard' car we'd usually drive.

I know to expect smaller hotel rooms when travelling in Europe, but I had no idea this extended to hire cars.

3. Fifteen year olds say the phrase 'on the podcast I listen to' a lot.
And by a lot, I mean a lot. I think it's awesome and exciting when kids find something on their own that they're really, really in to. A band, an artist, a podcast...but dear lord if I never hear that phrase again, well, I'd be perfectly okay with that.

4. Holidays aren't always relaxing.

To be honest, perhaps we were a little mad thinking we could fit in a two week trip to Europe around the relocation, the renovation and the husband's new job. We spent a lot of time chasing wifi signals (thank goodness Italy has come a long way in that regard), typing emails, figuring out if it was an appropriate hour to call Chicago or Sydney or Seoul, drafting org charts and compiling (rather long) to do lists for when we got back home... 

Luckily for the second half of the trip we were staying in agriturismi with poolside wifi, so the boys were happy to frolic in the water or read in the sunshine while we did our stuff. And we still managed to squeeze in some down time (especially on the boat where quite often we had no wifi or phone signal at all - enforced bliss!). Maybe we weren't that mad after all...

5. Not everywhere accepts credit card.

One hot day we were sitting in a restaurant in Tropea, eating lunch before heading off on a ferry to see Stromboli. Just after our antipasto, midway through our primo piatto, we asked if they took credit card. They didn't. A quick check of our wallets proved we were in for a good few hours of dishwashing if we didn't make a quick dash up the ridiculously steep cliff steps in the baking hot sun to find the only ATM in the village (and by 'we' I mean 'I'). 

(Also, speaking of the only ATM in the village, did I mention the husband managed to break it the next day? And did I mention it was the only ATM in the whole town?) 

(Which reminds me - if the elderly English couple who tried to use the ATM after us is reading this, I really hope you already had enough cash to pay for your lunch...)

6. Goats are awesome.

This little guy lived at the beautiful Villa Rizzo. He had a gimpy leg and giant eyes and ran over to have his head scratched when you called out to him. He was adorable.

*Bonus! Includes gratuitous gross generalisations based on nationality! 

Six Things I Learnt on the Trip That Was

Well, we're back! Our three months of travel madness is over. And I have to say I'm a little relieved. It's been unbelievably awesome but also a little exhausting. So it's nice to be home with the hounds, with a sense that I have some time to catch up on the paperwork, and to craft, blog and cook to my hearts content. 

Our last trip was pretty great - we went on a 12 night 'holy land' cruise. Our first stop was meant to be Egypt but, well, this was happening right when we were meant to dock so we went to Messina, Sicily and Valetta, Malta instead. In Messina we stumbled upon a giant mechanised clock, just when it was about to strike. In Valetta we visited the stunning blue grotto (see above). Not quite the great pyramids but rather pleasant all the same. Then it was on to Jerusalem, Piraeus and Naples, with a few lazy days in Rome tacked on for good measure. 

Here are six things I learnt:

1. Jerusalem really is amazing 

I wasn't brought up in a religious household. My Mum is most definitely not of the religious persuasion - 'spiritual' perhaps yes, but I think it's safe to say most organised religion leaves her cold. My Dad, even more so. My step-dad is Jewish, but (from my perspective, anyhow) more in a cultural sense than a religious one. I was one of the kids who had a note from their parents that meant I got to read in the library while everyone else was doing RI. So I wasn't sure how I'd feel about Jerusalem, being the place that holds some of the most sacred sites for three of the worlds big religions. I love history and I am fascinated by religion and ritual, but I just wasn't sure...but - it was amazing. 

It's tricky to find the words to explain why, maybe I'm still trying to figure it out in my own head, but I'll have a go. Partly it's seeing all those places that you normally see on the news, associated with violence and unrest, in a light that is peaceful, respectful and even (in the case of the western/wailing wall) festive. It's seeing devout Muslims and Jews and Christians going about their business, worshipping at these sacred sites which are literally next door to each other, in harmony. It's hearing the locals talk - with hope - about peace. It's seeing the separation walls and driving down shiny new highways that not too long ago were border walls with barbed wire and mines. 

There's also something about a place where people devote an entire day to just reading and thinking and praying, a place where people are involved and engaged in politics and the (very relevant) issues of the day. And then there's the food - falafel, hummus, shawarma oh my! It was amazing.

2. Introverts and cruises can mix 

I'm a bit of an introvert. My husband is basically an introvert. The eldest step son is a card carrying inrovert. (Or possible just a moody teen. Or, perhaps more likely, both.) You'd think that being trapped on a big boat, surrounded by thousands of other people day in day out, would be a tough ask. And yet we all enjoy a good cruise. 

The key for introverts is having a place to escape to, to get away from all the people, and the cabin definitely serves this purpose. But so does lying on a deck chair, staring up at the impossibly blue sky with your earphones wedged in to block out the noise of the crowd around you. And so does sitting at the bar just watching the passing parade. And so does sweating for an hour or so at the gym, iPod firmly in ears and eyes keenly scanning the horizon just in case dolphin decides to say 'hi'. Cocktail O'Clock helps a bit too...

3. You can never get tired of looking at an endless blue horizon 

Please see exhibits A, B and C below.

4. There are big differences between an American and an Italian cruise boat 

Our previous cruising experience has been with MSC, the cruise company that prides itself on it's 'distinctive Italian style'. For us, this meant great coffee, great food and great aperitifs. This year we went with Royal Caribbean, an American company that prides itself on good customer service. So it means the staff remember your name, and ask you questions about your day and your family. But it means the coffee sucks, the food is confused and the cocktails involve a lot of soft drink. 

Guess who we'll be cruising with in the future?

5. I travel for food 

Yes, yes I travel to see history and art and natural wonders. But when it comes down to it my favourite things from every trip always include at least one spectacular meal. My travel memories are always centred around the smell and taste of a region or town. And my desire to return is almost always driven by a desire to eat that thing, whatever it was, again. 

This trip it was peanut butter thickshakes at Johnny Rockets (yep, the ship we were on had one on board!); the best falafel and hummus I have ever eaten (just outside Damscas Gate in the Old City of Jerusalem, served by a friendly Palestinian and featuring amazing olive oil from the West Bank); the heavenly flavours of simple Italian food (risotto, prosciutto with mozzarella, garlic and oil bruschetta, pizza diavolo)...yum!

6. That security guards in the Vatican Museum are anxious around vomit 

So. We're walking along the impressive gallery of maps in the Vatican Museum, weaving our way through the crowds and admiring the 16th century frescoes, when the youngest step-son says 'I'm not feeling very well'. Now, I've known this little guy long enough to know this actually means 'You've got thirty seconds to find me a vomit receptacle or else there's going to be some additional 'paint' on these historic maps'. Serendipitously my husband had just bought (yet another) travel guide, and for some reason I'd kept the plastic bag. So, there we stood, amongst the throngs of tourists heading to the Sistine Chapel, whilst the poor sick youngest step son did what he had to do...

In case you don't know, the fun part of being in the Vatican Museum is that once you're on the path to the Sistine Chapel you can't really exit, until you've seen the Sistine Chapel. And if you're carrying a bag of vomit, don't expect a warm welcome or a great deal of help from the guards scattered about the place...